


When Can I See You

by keithsteeth



Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: M/M, Pittsburg Penguins - Freeform, Slight pining, Visually Impaired, blind
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-03
Updated: 2015-07-03
Packaged: 2018-04-07 10:47:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,479
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4260417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/keithsteeth/pseuds/keithsteeth
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was Sidney's mother who'd first noticed his odd behaviours. They'd started when he was about 2 months old. She would call him and he wouldn't look at her and instead he had always looked dazedly around the room. What the doctor told her later on was nothing she could have thought of. </p>
<p> "Mrs. Crosby, I'm sorry to inform you, but you're son is visually impaired."</p>
            </blockquote>





	When Can I See You

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the tumblr prompt; ones blind and falls for the others voice 
> 
> I veered off from that a little and made it more than that but I hope you enjoy. 
> 
> P.s: also keep in mind that the timing isn't correct so dates aren't 100% right, etc., etc.

August 1988

It was Sidney's mother who'd first noticed his odd behaviours. They'd started when he was about 2 months old. She would call him and he wouldn't look at her and instead he had always looked dazedly around the room. She'd been so worried that she called the doctor immediately and had made an appointment for that afternoon. She was antsy all day. By the time she arrived at the doctors office she'd gone over every possible situation. What the doctor told her later on was nothing she could have thought of. 

"Mrs. Crosby, I'm sorry to inform you, but you're son is visually impaired." According to Dr. Smith Trina had done nothing wrong during her pregnancy. 'Sidney's impairment was nothing but sheer luck.' She'd frowned when he had said this and told him it was never down to luck. She loved her son, if he could see or not and that was the end of it. Everything was fine. For now. 

November 1989

When Sidney started crawling they ran into more problems. Literally. Sidney was constantly knocking into things. It took him 2 months longer than a normal child to learn how to walk and the moment he did they took him to buy a white cane. The process was longer than they had expected. The company had to measure his height in order to give Sidney the proper sized white cane. It was a long process but once it was done they couldn't have been more grateful. 

March 1996

When Sidney was 8 his parents had another baby. His little sister Taylor. His parents didn't know how he'd react, as they would with any child. The day his parents brought Taylor home he was sat on the couch and introduced to her. He ran his hands along her tiny body, the way he did with any new, unfamiliar person. "She's tiny," he whispered, "Can I hold her in my arms?" he asked, looking where he assumed his mother was sitting. 

"Sure you can honey, open your arms," he felt a pillow slide under his elbow and then a tiny body being placed into his arms. Taylor was warm and smelled very faintly like the baby cream mommy put on him sometimes. She moved a little and he rose his hand to touch her soft head and was surprised to find a very little amount of hair.

"What colour is her hair?" he'd asked his parents. They'd told him then that it was blonde and that her eyes were blue. He closed his eyes picturing the blonde he knew; the blonde of warm sand beneath his toes, the hay he fed the horses at his friends barn. He moved his fingers across her cheeks and to her little nose. He smiled as he felt her hand grasp around his finger. He imagined her eyes, blue like the water in Cole Harbour. The water his parents described to him, the blue he could only imagine. He imagined that she was staring up at him so he opened his eyes and looked down where he knew her eyes were. "Hi Taylor, I'm your big brother Sidney. I can't really see you but I know what you look like and you're so pretty. I love you Taylor." She'd squeezed his fingers then and he'd imagined it was because she'd understood. 

September 2002

Nothing had prepared Sidney for his four years of high school. The first few weeks of grade 9 weren't too bad. He knew people talked about him and that they stared but he just tried to ignore it. 

One day in December Sidney had worn a Pittsburgh Penguins shirt to school. Hockey was one of his favourite things in the whole world. People had always found that strange. That he "watched" a sport that he couldn't even see. The commentators came in handy for that, he listened to most of the things they said and if they slacked his sister helped him out. The fans always got him so excited and that was one of his favourite parts. When he'd worn his shirt to school a kid in his grade named  
Shamus poked him during Science class. 

"Whats the deal with this shirt Crosby?" Shamus had always picked on Sidney, he'd talk bad about him to other people and Sidney's friends always said that he would walk behind him mimicking every step he took. Sidney didn't give him an answer just continued listening to Mr. Raymond teach them about the food chain. 

"Hey blind boy, answer my question," Shamus said jabbing Sidney in the back again. Sidney could feel anger boiling up in his chest but he also felt sad. Shamus kept jabbing his back until Sidney whispered, "I like them okay." 

Shamus laughed right in Sidney's ear, "You're a fool Sidney Crosby. Are you trying to act normal by pretending to watch a sport that everyone here loves. Just give up already. You'll never be normal." 

Sidney said nothing, just rose his hand and asked to use the washroom. As Sidney made his way to the door he heard Shamus call him a cry baby.

He made his way to the bathroom before he actually started to cry. He didn't want to live up to the name Shamus had just bestowed upon him, but he couldn't help it. He'd never made it back to class that day, which made everything worse. 

He heard people in the halls refer to him as Sidney cry baby all throughout ninth and tenth grade. Going into eleventh he got a new one. Cindy Crosby. 

March 2004

It was in March of grade eleven and Sidney had just left his last period class. Usually he'd meet his friend James outside his classroom, go to his locker, get his stuff and they would both get onto the bus to take them home. But he'd been desperately in need of a bathroom break so he hadn't waited for James and had gone straight to the bathroom. Without thinking he went into the first one he came across, which ended up being the girls. People had saw what had happened and started a rumour that he was secretly a female. Thus nick naming him Cindy Crosby. 

These two nick names never wore off and people would even call him by them to his face. He never thought twice about them until something, or someone came around in the summer between eleventh and twelfth grade. 

August 2004

During the summers Sidney, James and Taylor went to the community rink. They always held hockey camps there for four weeks during July. That summer James was finally old enough to join. James was also paired with another boy their age from Russia who would live with him for the summer like an exchange student. But instead of school they'd play hockey. It sounded perfect to Sidney. 

On the first day of camp Taylor led Sidney up to a seat in the top row and they sat down. Sidney loved the feeling of the rink, the coolness he felt right as he stepped in. The sound of the players skates carving into the ice below him. The sound of Taylor's breathing beside him, sharp intakes when something interesting happened. Taylor's soft voice explaining play-by-plays. 

Taylor began cheering and Sidney asked what was going on. "Malkin, number 71 just checked Adams number 13 and stole the puck." I smiled, it seemed to be that every time Taylor freaked out it was over Malkin. Sidney was starting to like him. 

Really all that they watched were scrimmages but Sidney got so into them that they passed by very fast. "I have to use the washroom Taylor" Sid told his sister. 

"Come on, it's this way" she led him off to his left and pushed open a door for him. He used his white cane to find a vacant stall and pushed the door closed. After washing his hands he opened the door and felt Taylor wrap her arm through his. "Come on, James is waiting for us, he wants you to meet someone." 

Sidney was confused, but soon they were stopped by James. "Hey Sid, this is my friend, from Russia," James explained. Taylor turned Sid towards the new man in front of him. 

"Hi I'm Sidney or Sid I guess" he stuck out his hand for the guy to shake. He felt a warm, calloused palm against his own and strong fingers clasp around his. 

"Evgeni Malkin, but you call me Geno" Sid could practically hear the smile in Geno's voice. 

"It's nice to meet you, you're a great hockey player" he told him as they walked along to the parking lot. 

"Thank you Sid, means a lot." 

Over the course of the summer Geno became a best friend to Sid. Sid went to every one of his practices, spent time with him away from the rink and Geno even let Sid play road hockey with him. Geno knew it was hard for Sid but he was so patient with him and he never treated Sid like he was blind. 

One of Sid's favourite things about Geno though, was his voice. He had such a strong Russian accent that sometimes Sid couldn't understand what he was saying. He loved it anyways. The roughness in the way Geno pronounced his words, the way Geno rolled his R's - it made Sidney want to see his tongue move - how Geno pronounced all his W's as V's because as Geno had said, "No W in Russian language Sid." Sid loved the way that Geno's I's sounded more like a double e. Like when Geno said Sid's own name. Coming out of Geno's mouth it sounded more like 'Seed'. Even the broken English. Everything about it made Sidney want to hear him talk forever. 

Sid would sometimes imagine how Geno looked. Geno had told him that he had black curly hair, eyes even darker than that. He was tall too, taller than Sid. Sid knew that. 

One day Geno had caved and let Sid touch his face. Like he'd done with Taylor. It hadn't helped much from what Geno had already told him. But it was nice to feel Geno.

When the end of the summer came along Sidney couldn't have imagined the way he'd feel. He had said goodbye to Geno and had even let Geno hug him. Then he had ordered Taylor to take him home. He sat in his room all day. He didn't understand what his feelings were telling him. Sure Geno had been his best friend but best friends didn't silently want the others touch, never wanted the other to talk for hours just so he could hear the way they said his name. Sid knew he was acting stupid, knew he was being ridiculous so when his mother called him out of his room he pushed every silent thought of Geno to a dusty crevice of his mind and locked them away. 

August 2007 

Sid had been waiting for a letter from any of the universities he'd applied to. He knew schools didn't bargain for impaired students when they could have someone much smarter, with a higher IQ and better sight. His mother told him to stop saying such insane things. He just told her it wasn't insane.  
Until he got a letter from the University of Pittsburgh. 

He'd applied for their stenography course, he'd always loved the idea of journalism and he'd thought this sort of career would be perfect. 

When he'd told his parents of his acceptance his father had clapped him on the back and his mother had begun crying tears of joy. Taylor was only 11 when he left for Pittsburgh. In a way he felt like he was failing her because she wouldn't grow up with a sibling. Then again Sidney never told anyone that he figured it to be better that he wasn't around, that she could grow up without having to take care of him. It was his job to do that for her. 

When Sidney had first arrived in Pittsburgh he was scared shitless. There was so many people in the airport and he kept hitting the back of people's heels with his white cane. He felt ridiculous. In that moment he was glad he couldn't see people's reactions. The university had sent down a car for him, which they told him would be at gate 7. That information didn't help him much as he couldn't see where gate 7 was. 

He didn't know how but he'd found his way to an information booth, at least that's what the lady at the desk said when he'd stepped up. 

"Hi, I'm sorry to be a bother but could someone show me which way gate 7 is? I have a car waiting for me there." Sid tried to ask as politely as possible. 

"Sure thing, I'll get someone to walk you over right now." 

Soon enough a women was standing next to him. He told her it was fine to stick her arm through his and lead the way. When she'd done it it reminded him of Taylor. 

"I'm Emilia by the way," she'd told Sidney right after she began walking to what he assumed was gate 7. 

"I'm Sidney or Sid," he said smiling in her direction. 

"Well aren't you the cutest thing, where are you from Sid?" 

"Cole Harbour, Nova Scotia" Sid said. 

"Ooh a Canadian boy. Was your flight alright?"

Sid nodded his head, "It was fine, I had a free seat. The guy didn't show up." 

"That's nice. We're almost there, who's waiting for you?" 

"University of Pittsburgh, there should be a car.." 

"Oh I see it! Looks like they're right on time" Emilia walked Sid to the door and opened it for him, helping him slide in. 

"It was nice to meet you Sid" she said before closing the door. 

The ride to his dorm wasn't long, maybe 20 minutes or so with the traffic. He hadn't brought much stuff other than his bedding, a weeks amount of clothes and his toothbrush. His parents planned on sending a bunch of his clothing and personal items in the mail in a few weeks. He thanked the driver when he pulled up to the building and got out, making his way to the front doors.

Sid's room was on the first floor thankfully and when he unlocked the door he was greeted by bumping his white cane into another person. 

"Oh I'm sorry!" He didn't even know his roommate was already here. 

"Hey, no problem. Here let me move out of the way for you." 

He showed Sid to the bed that wasn't occupied and he sat down on it. 

"I'm Sidney, you can call me Sid though" he said to his roommate, sticking out his hand in the direction he assumed he was. 

He felt another hand grip onto his, "I'm Marc, it's nice to meet you roomie!" He heard him laugh after. At least he seemed like a good guy. 

Throughout university Sid grew to love more things like he loved hockey. He went home for Christmas, summer, and other holidays and he didn't feel as bad about leaving Taylor. She grew up just like he'd imagined even when he couldn't be there to see her. He'd graduated from the University of Pittsburgh in the summer of 2013. 

Present- August 2014

Sidney had turned his alarm clock on for 7am. Thankfully he hadn't been too tired and he'd only clicked snooze once. It was 8:30 when Sid stepped out the door, dressed in his suit and satchel over his shoulder. Sid had gotten a job at an interview company right out of university. His job was to accompany the interviewer to their job and write down the questions and answers for future reference.

Today he was going to Consol Energy Centre to listen to a panel. He wasn't sure who was being interviewed but he was super excited. He was nervous too though because a couple years back a hockey player named Evgeni Malkin had been drafted to the Penguins, he immediately knew it was Geno. He'd kept it a secret that that had been a big influence on why Sid had chosen Pittsburgh U. The slight chance of ever seeing Geno again made his heart soar.

Sid arrived at Consol at 10:00am, a half an hour early. He met his coworker at the conference room that had been set up for the panel. Sid and his coworker Matt sat at the back as they didn't need to see anything specifically. Around 10:20 the room was buzzing and Sid heard the doors open and voices waft in. He assumed it was the players coming into the room.

Matt turned to him and said, "Looks like it's four of the newer guys on the team, you ready?" Sid nodded and sat, waiting. 

The panel began and Sid listened to other people's questions. The mic was finally passed on to Matt and Sid perked up. He brought his pen to paper and listened as Matt asked, "Is there anything you're excited for as you begin your NHL career?" 

Sid jotted down Matt's question and waited for Matt to inform him who was answering the question. 

"Beau Bennett's about to answer", Matt told him. 

Sid listened to Bennett's answer and wrote it down. The mic came back to Matt a little while later and again Bennett answered the question. 

At 11:00 they took a short break and Matt went to the snack table to get himself and Sid a drink. When Matt got back Sid handed him the sheet of paper he was writing on. 

"Okay good, I'm going to ask another one soon so just be ready. You doing good?" Sid nodded in Matt's general direction as he handed him his paper back.

When the panel started again and the mic got returned to Matt Sid sat up straight.

"Who is someone that has helped you get to the point you are at today? Other than your parents, we all know they were a huge help", Matt asked. 

Sid heard a few people chuckle. Matt elbowed him and said, "Looks like Evgeni Malkin is going to finally answer a question."

Sid froze. His whole body was frozen. Except his heart, which was beating 300x faster than normal. He breathed in and out and jotted down 'Malkin' on the paper. 

"The person that help me get to this point in life I would say it is my coaches. In junior my coach help me train and go to my highest potential. I went to a summer camp too, when I was kid. I met great people there, the people help me realize I was good a lot to get here. It help me focus on my dream." 

Sid couldn't help but think that Geno may be talking about him. He shook the thought out of his head and listened silently to the rest of the panel. 

At 12:00 the panel finished and Sid and Matt left the conference room. Sid was still dumbstruck by Geno. The fact that he was here and he'd gotten to hear his voice again brought old familiar feelings back. Matt said bye to Sid and told him to email him the formal copy of the questions by the end of the work day. 

Sid was almost at the elevator when he heard laughing and footsteps following closely behind him. He stood close to the elevator doors and pressed the down button listening as the group got closer. The footsteps got louder as the elevator doors opened and Sid walked in. 

"Hold the door please," he heard one of the guys say. He searched for the button, quickly feeling the Braille as he pressed it. 

"Thanks man", he heard the guy say. Sid pressed himself against the back wall, he could feel the people staring at him so he just watched the floor. The elevator dung as it reached the ground floor and he waited until he heard all of the footsteps leave the elevator before he left. 

He began walking towards the doors but stopped as he felt a hand on his back. He spun around and backed out of the persons grasp. 

"Um..", he heard the guy say. 

"Did you need something?" Sid asked slowly backing away. 

"Sorry, just. Sidney? Is you?" Geno  
whispered. 

Sid's breath caught in his throat. He knew his eyes had widened and his mouth had dropped open. How had Geno remembered him. Sid was sure he would have forgotten him the moment he left Cole Harbour. 

"I-yeah, it's me Geno." Sid replied, letting out the breath he'd been holding. The one he'd probably been holding since Geno had left all the way back in 2004.


End file.
